HAPPINESS BEGINS WHEN WE APPRECIATE WHAT WE HAVE
I donāt know about you, but as Iāve grown older, Iāve realized that my understanding of happiness has changed as well. I remember looking for happiness mostly in the future when I was younger. A good education, a good career, a better position, a more comfortable lifeā¦ When we are young, we set goals for ourselves and often leave happiness waiting somewhere beyond those goals.
āIf I can accomplish thisā¦ā
āIf I can have thatā¦ā
āIf I can earn a little moreā¦ā
It is as though there is a point somewhere in life where everything will finally fall into place, and we will be able to say, āNow I have enough.ā
As the years pass, we begin to understand that life does not quite work that way. We get used to what we have surprisingly quickly. Something we longed for yesterday can become an ordinary part of our lives today. Then our eyes turn toward something else we lack.
Most of the time, we live by counting what we donāt have rather than what we do.
A bigger house, a better car, more money, a higher position, a more luxurious vacationā¦
āWeāll be happy when we have that, too,ā we tell ourselves.
Yet by constantly postponing happiness to the future, we consume the present without even noticing it. If we wake up in the morning and can open our eyes to a new day, that alone is no small thing.
If someone we love is still by our sideā¦
If a friend calls and asks, āHow are you?ā
If we have a table to sit around in the eveningā¦
If we can read a book, listen to music we love, hear the sound of rain, or feel the warmth of the sunā¦
Then life is still giving us a great deal.
But we often fail to see these things because we spend more time looking at other peopleās lives than our own.
Our neighbor has a newer car.
Our friend earns more.
Someone else has a bigger house.
Someone elseās child is more successful.
On social media, someone elseās life looks more beautiful.
Then we look at our own lives and decide that something is missing.
Yet there is hardly anything more unfair than comparing someone elseās showcase with the kitchen of our own life.
We often think of happiness as something to be reached:
āWhen I pay off my debtsā¦ā
āWhen I retireā¦ā
āWhen I have more moneyā¦ā
āWhen my children succeedā¦ā
Of course, all these things matter. There is nothing wrong with wanting a better life. But when we tie all our happiness to some future condition, we condemn ourselves to an endless wait.
Because one goal is achieved, and another takes its place.
One problem is solved, and another appears.
We get what we desire, and before long, we find ourselves chasing something else.
Life never becomes completely finished.
Perhaps happiness begins, before having more, with recognizing the value of what we already have.
Savoring a cup of teaā¦
Talking with a friend we havenāt seen in a long timeā¦
Sitting quietly for a few minutes in the stillness of our home in the eveningā¦
Hearing a childās laughterā¦
Feeling the coolness of the morning air on our faceā¦
These may seem like small things. Yet life, after all, is often nothing more than the sum of these small moments.
Sometimes, in trying to increase our happiness, we consume the happiness we already have.
We chase after a bigger table and forget the people already sitting around our table.
We give our time in pursuit of more money, only to realize later that the time we have lost cannot be bought back.
This is one of lifeās bitter ironies:
In our pursuit of having more, we sometimes spend the most valuable thing we already possessāour life.
That is why gratitude does not mean wanting nothing.
Gratitude means seeking something better without losing sight of the value of what you already have.
Of course, want something better. Earn more. Set new goals. Strive to change your life.
But while chasing tomorrow, do not diminish today.
Because sometimes what we need is not a new life.
We simply need to look at the life we already have with different eyes.
The number of things you possess may not change.
But the meaning you give them can.
And perhaps true wealth does not begin when we have more, but when we finally realize how much value there already is in what we have.
Ā